You Follow Me

Yup. It happened to me just like it has probably happened to you!  I've fallen victim to social media comparison!

Many  of us can relate. We follow others on social media and consider their lives based on their posts and then, either consciously or unconsciously, compare it to our own lives. Typically, compared to theirs, our lives seem less exciting, even lame sometimes, and that never feels good.

Many already know the solution to this problem, but if you haven't heard it yet, here it is: You need to understand that you are comparing someone else's outside to your inside.

Most people only put the "highlight reel" of their life on social media. We don't see the hardships behind all those perfect posts and pictures. Then we compare that to our lives which we know, all too well, are not perfect. In fact, ours can seem lacking compared to the lives of our friends.

Here's my social media comparison story:

Many years ago, early one morning, I was enjoying a cup of coffee and scrolling social media. I was fairly new to Facebook and was looking at a friend's wall. I hadn't seen her in decades, but we had just reconnected through Facebook. 

It started with a selfie of her with her husband, both looking incredibly happy. 

"Hmm," I thought.  "She married a handsome man."

I scrolled some more.

Next I  found pictures of her lovely children who had grown into successful adults.

"Wow, look at all they've accomplished!" I thought.

Then there were pictures upon pictures of adorable, angelic, grandchildren.

"She looks like she hasn't gained a pound in all these years, and she is a grandmother too. Nice." I thought without smiling.

Moving on, I came to their vacation photos.

After seeing the sandy beaches and beautiful condo, I stopped and looked away from the computer. The more I looked at her photos the more discouraged I became with the life I'm living. 

Why is her life so perfect and mine is so . . . so ordinary? I began to feel empty.

Envy started rising up in me.

I closed Facebook and sighed. I've learned long ago that I am most happy and satisfied when I am content with what  God has given me. When envy arises in me, I need to nip it in the bud and lay my feelings before the Lord.  As I walked away from the computer, I prayed a little prayer that God would change my attitude and then change my day so I wouldn't get sucked into the downward spiral of discouragement and discontentment.

After a long, hot shower, I returned downstairs to begin my day. Before long, my phone pinged to notify me of a inbound message.

I opened Facebook to find a note from a friend. I saw her the previous Sunday when she greeted my son Kyle, who has Down syndrome, and me. After she said hello, Kyle stubbornly refused to greet her back.  Although she was gracious about it, I was a bit disappointed with my son.

She sent me this message because she thought I'd want to know that when our conversation ended and I walked away, a gentleman, who had been waiting for his daughter, went over to her and asked about me.

Surprisingly, this what she told me he said, "I don't know that woman's name, but I sit near her in church, and she is just amazing with that dear boy." They both remarked how sweet Kyle is and how lucky he is to have a mom who shows him such love and care. 

"Really?" I thought.

She also said this: "I am always inspired by your patient ways with Kyle and the strength that just radiates from you."

I smiled and appreciated the encouragement. I recognized immediately God's gentle whisper and quick answer to my prayer. He impressed on me that I am called to be Kyle's mom and to raise him so he can fulfill the purpose that God has planned for him. I remembered how faithful God has been to give me patience and strength to deal with the hard parts of raising this child, and I smiled when I thought of all the joy he brings to our family.

The best part of this message from my friend was the perfect timing of it. I received it just when I needed reassurance to keep pressing on. God, with tender kindness, knew exactly when I would need encouragement to continue faithfully on the journey He has set out for me. My prayer is that He would receive the glory as I am faithful to what He has called me to do.

Comparing our lives to someone else's is never helpful. 

And . . . it's usually not accurate.

When I focus on what God has asked me to do, I get a deep sense of satisfaction and contentment. God has a plan for me just as He has a plan for you.

It reminds me of the passage in John 21:22 where Jesus had been talking to Peter about things that concerned only Peter. When Peter became curious about John, one of the other disciples, Jesus answered him, "What is that to you? You follow me!”

It's our job to keep our eyes on Jesus without looking to the left or the right. Each of us is called to a different journey, and when we keep our focus on God, He is faithful to lead us and love us and gives us grace upon grace should we ever get side tracked.

Remembering God's faithfulness in the past and recognizing His presence with me now as I press on is more precious to me than the most envious vacation picture anyone could ever post.

When I follow others on social media, I remember His words, "You follow me!"